“God, I Used to Wonder…”

By Raudah Mohd Yunus
Freelance Writer- Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

Why things must be hard. Then I learnt that difficulties brings strength...


I used to wonder

Why did You create me?

My inner voice says: for a purpose it must be


I used to wonder

Why must there be sadness

And why misery pollutes this short life

When every soul yearns for happiness

As without it none can survive


You answered in wisdom and subtlety

Did not You remind me this life is temporary

And for the righteous is eternal joy, so why shall I worry?


I used to wonder

Why things must be hard

Then I learnt that difficulties brings strength

And relief to the fragile heart


I used to wonder

Why is there injustice, ugly unfairness

Truth weeps in silence, and ignorance chants falseness

Then I witnessed souls dying for truthfulness,

O pure souls, You certainly have stood up to fallaciousness!


I used to wonder

How to live with You, and for You

As I find myself too weak, is my heart to You true?


I used to fear

If I devote myself to You, would people say I'm cool?

But then again, just who am I trying to fool,


I used to wonder

What'll happen to me when I die,

Will I be punished, in hell I cry?

Or will I be welcome, in your infinite mercy I lie?


Will you count every mistake that I made,

Or forgive me when I tremble before the hell gate,


Or will you keep my crimes secret,

And throw me into heaven, before I can even regret,


I used to wonder

How much your love and mercy is

Perhaps none will understand, until the soul sees the garden of bliss,


I used to imagine the beauty of paradise,

How its river shall look, how its sun shall rise,

But you said imagination will never be right,

So how shall I grasp what is unreachable by sight?


I used to wonder

How can there be a greater beauty

Than what my senses already perceive accurately



Surely you have created nothing in vain

For that will cause to every heart confusion and pain

I wonder why have You given me the power to reason

If not to do virtue, and reach your divine horizon


I wonder if humanity will ever be,

Living in Your guidance, from sorrow free


Perhaps that day is near,

When solidarity stands superior

And hatred and enmity disappear


God, by Your grace

I believe that day is our fate

When tears do not fall, and smiles do not fade.

Related Links:
Does God Think About You?
Praise God in the Way He Deserves to be Praised
I Dealt With God Directly!
Raudah Mohd Yunus is currently a DrPH (Doctor of Public Health) candidate at the University of Malaya, Kuala Lumpur. She obtained her MBBCH from Alexandria University, Egypt.
She enjoys travelling, reading, writing, painting, calligraphy and doing social and humanitarian work nationally and internationally.

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